PAS Poll 2006

Enough of the waiting, here’s the results from the big “End of Year” PAS poll – thanks to all who submitted entries (and there were lots of you), and those that didn’t, consider yourselves told what was good and bad last year! Special thanks to those that added comments (oooh, the wit & bile!) – you remain anonymous…

Top Five Singles

It all went to form bar the surprise popularity of the ’Scream (all too old or is it too tasteful?!)

  1. Hot Chip – “Over & Over” (yes I know its been released over and over since 2003 [ho ho] but it is still the best of all the animals.)
  2. Gnarls Barkley – “Crazy” (No need to say anything about this is there? One of those records that unites everyone with its utter ace-ness. Yes, we were all sick of it by the end of the summer, especially all the rubbish covers, but one of the defining tunes of 2006 nevertheless.)
  3. Peter, Bjorn & John – “Young Folks”
  4. Primal Scream – “Country Girl” (Superb silliness… yeah hehhhh what can a poor boy do? Yey, back to their early nineties peak – so say some.)
  5. CSS – “Let’s Make Love & Listen To Death From Above”

Bubbling under :

The Gossip – “Standing in the Way of Control (Soulwax nite version)”
The ONLY way to hear this recor – fast, furious and totally out of control with added head melting drum breaks – its probably the musical equivalent of drinking a pint of Jagermeister and coke down in one, whilst someone hits you over the head with a biscuit tin.
The Human Beinz – “Nobody But Me (Pilooski edit)”
Freakbeat/garage classic turned into a roaring, relentless, dubbed-out Krautrock monster on a must-have bootleg, courtesy of Paris’ D.I.R.T.Y. Sound System. One punter’s response – “Can you please take off this f*cking drug music and play something decent?”
Lily Allen – “Smile”
Klaxons – “Gravity’s Rainbow”
Maximo Park – “I Want You To Stay”
Makes me homesick.
Hot Chip – “Boy From School”
Over and Over’s all-round ubiquity and Michael Myers-like refusal to die meant this one got overlooked a little, but not by me.
Mason – “Exceeder (Martin Ten Valden Remix)”
Quality remix on a bassy electro vibe.
Snow Patrol – “Chasing Cars”
Beautiful, amazing, wonderful, gorgeous – not enough adjectives to describe it properly.

Top Five Albums

A right mixed bag (and one I’ve not even heard!) big your “eclectic” selves up!

  1. Arctic Monkeys – “Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not” (I understand every word!)
  2. Hot Chip – “The Warning” (Just lovely. Apart from the singers lime green Nike vest top which isn’t.)
  3. The Killers – “Sam’s Town” (Not as good as “Hot Fuss” but pretty close and anything with a nod to Bruce is alright in my book.)
  4. Midlake – “Trials Of Van Occupanther” (It’s just like Laurel Canyon c.1972, except it isn’t.)
  5. Morrissey – “Ringleader Of The Tormentors” (He’s in love and can’t you just tell? Bellissimo!)

Bubbling under :

Cat Power – “The Greatest”
Reminds me of happy times in NYC
The Fratellis – “Costello Music”
You (Pab) summed it perfectly, miserable sods, great tunes…
Tapes N Tapes – “The Loon”
DO believe the hype.
T.I. – “King”
Good enough to make you seriously consider sticking 22" rims on a Fiat Marea.
Peasty’s House – “Mix CDR’s Jan ’06 / April ’06 / June ’06 / Sept ’06 / Dec ’06”
The Flaming Lips – “At War With The Mystics”
Can I put them forward for best costumes as well?
Muse – “Black Holes and Revelations”
On a about the 5th listen I finally got it and shook off the Queen playing a Rock opera comparison.

Best Film

Very popular winner but it did split the camp…

The Departed
Apart from the very last shot with the rat running across the balcony rail. Marty what were you thinking? You didn’t need to trowel it on. We got the point. Leo was fab though – even though he had a face like a tortured brussel sprout for 95% of the movie.
Great acting, great storyline and a great ending.
Life’s too short to waste time watching bad films, but my favourites of the year were The Departed and The Inside Man. Storming returns-to-form from two outstanding directors, great ensemble casts and some memorable individual performances. The latter just shades it by virtue of avoiding a pat Hollywood ending and not setting itself the unenviable task of remaking one of the best films of the last ten years
Happy Feet
Who can argue with dancing and singing penguins in a Moulin Rouge stylee? Seriously, go see it!
Little Miss Sunshine
Super freaks!
Pan’s Labyrinth
Never cried as much at a film through laughter in my life.

Worst Film

It seems there were a lot more bad films than good in 2006…

The Squid and the Whale
Very, very bad – thought it was supposed to be like the Royal Tenenbaums – the only similarity was beards.
Superman Returns
I wish he hadn’t.
The Break Up
Terrible film; that’s what happens when you let the fairer sex choose what to watch.
I saw it on video. I wish I hadn’t. I’ve been more scared in Fulham.
Get Rich or Die Tryin’
Ego mania (and apparently fictional), could only watch 15 minutes (on Sky – would not pay to see that tw*t.) He should get bottled off as per Reading more often.
The Departed
OK, this obviously isn’t actually the worst film of the year, but I haven’t seen a particularly bad film that has been released this year, but I am p*ssed off at Scorcese for joining the growing ranks of directors/producers who feel the need to remake every great film that comes from the east. AND he changed the ending. Grrrrr.

Best TV

There was only ever gonna be one winner here…

  1. The Sopranos – again, but not for much longer, sob.
  2. That Mitchell and Webb Thing
  3. Life On Mars – Genius. Sam Tyler may have travelled back in time to 1973, but those of us that live in Wigan wake up there everyday.
  4. The Wire – Trust me, nothing else comes close. Here’s what you do; get the DVDs of seasons 1 & 2 NOW. Get season 3 when it comes out in February. Soak it all up. You’ll be clearing the boards for Season 4 when it starts on FX in March. By the time it finishes, you’ll be gagging for the fifth and final season, and asking yourself why it took you so long to catch on. Still, better late than never, though. Besides, once The Sopranos has ended, you’ll need to fill the void with something, and CSI, 24 and all that other stuff isn’t in the same league.
  5. Dragons Den – particularly the Australian with the rectangular head.
  6. Entourage – Great acting, cameos, chicas and Ari (Jeremy Piven) is the king of the one liners – let’s hug it out!… because it makes you feel like a filmstar.

Worst TV

All yer soaps/reality stuff (natch), plus these gems…

  • Paul Merson on Skysports – Speak English man!
  • Harry Hill – In anything. He is not funny. End of. Read a book instead.

Top Player

It’s all Man Yoo and Norn Iron…again! (sort’ve)

Cristiano Ronaldo
The year Princess Tippytoes became a man.
Made England look sh*te.
Proving all the little Englander’s wrong, despite the ludicrous campaign against him by the popular press and more sadly the BBC.
Has been the best player of the season so far with out question
Did you see THAT goal?
Miroslav Klose
Because we won a stack on him as top goal scorer in the world cup!
Linvoy Primus
Understated, knows his limits, keeps it simple, plays the percentage ball, solid in the air and on the ground and keeps on raising his game to keep his name as first on the team sheet. Has made Sol Campbell a great player again. And does great work with the disabled and disadvantaged.
David Healy
After his winner v England he surpassed himself with a hat-trick against Spain.
Even my little boy loves him, cue ’away in a manger’ version “lay down where he lay, Healy, Healy!”

Worst Player

I’m surprised you lot haven’t dissolved in your own bile…

  • Michael Ballack – …and his Paul Robinson from Neighbours hair. Don’t it make you feel good? NO!
  • Ben Thatcher – Pedro Mendes on the end of Thatcher’s forearm; that ain’t football
  • Titus Bramble – We’d be better with an actual bramble, at least it’d be in position a few times a game.
  • Ashley Cole – Hypocritical tw*t who doesn’t live in the real world. 4000 copies of “his” (sic) book sold; hunt down all of the f*ckers.
  • Does Peter Kenyon count?

Best Football Moment

Football’s great innit!

  • That Argentina goal – 345 passes and still counting
  • Stevie G in the Cup Final, the 21-pass build-up to Argentina’s second goal against Serbia-Montenegro and the volley from Esteban Cambiasso at the end of it, Maxi Rodriguez’s goal against Mexico, and Xabi’s against the hapless Toon
  • A football club giving something back? NUFC hands out a free scarf to everyone at Pompey home game. More of this please
  • Finally beating Chelski 2-1 at WHL
  • Zidane headbutt
  • The arrival of John Gregory. Now we’re only knee deep in it.
  • As a City fan… there weren’t many, except that week I thought we were going to go all the way in the FA cup (god damn West Aaaamm)… kind of explains how bad it’s been for us blues over the years
  • Villa Cup equalizer – can we play you every week!
  • Alan Shearer retiring- whatever he says he was a loon for not coming to Man Yoo and winning trophies
  • Pedro Mendes second goal v Man City – it kick-started Pompey’s remarkable survival and current Champion’s League position… Oh, and going to the World Cup Final.
  • Watching Northwich stuff Stafford 3-1 to clinch the Conference North Title.
  • Norn Iron 3, Spain 2 – our wee country higher in the rankings than the Republic!

Worst Football Moment

Overwhelming response to this and it’s nice to see I’m not alone on the Ronnie front…

England in the World Cup
Losing to Portugal on penalties. Gutted.
Just pick any game!
All of England’s World Cup games.
England in Germany.
Finally realising how stupid it was to have ever even entertained the idea that England could win the World Cup.
The appointement of 2nd choice Steve. England will continue to meet my low expectations.
Every moment Jose celebrated another Chelsea win with a complete lack of grace and humility. And the Ashley and Frank books. Oh, and Switzerland/Ukraine
Graham Poll
The three yellow cards debacle – seriously, I don’t claim to know much about football, but surely counting up to 2 isn’t tricky for anyone???
BBC World Cup Coverage
The anti-portugese bias on BBC1 during the World Cup, especially Shearer’s comments about what Rooney should do to Ronaldo – embarrassing.
FA Cup
Going out to West Ham in the quarter finals, I was soooooooo sure it was City this year!
Miserable Toon
Watching us get beat by Chelski in the FA Cup and the realisation that Shearer would never win anything with us.

Best Gig

I’m upset cos I missed out on nearly all of these…

Morrissey – Gmex, MCR
Up until 9pm on Friday 22nd December, it was Hot Chip at the Academy, however a certain Mr Stephen Patrick Morrissey put paid to that. Just when I thought he had lost it forever (Bridgewater Hall gig – need I say more?) up he pops with a masterclass in how to be an icon. He soared, he shone, he shimmied and did it all with the sweaty abs of a man 20 years his junior. Oye Esteban!
King Creosote at Night and Day, MCR
The only time I’ve ever known the crowd be totally silent while someone plays. Brilliant!
The Who at Hyde Park.
Miles better than a bunch of fellers their age has any real right to be, and proof that, if you’re truly great, you don’t stop being great, even when half the band dies.
Hot Chip. The Luminaire, Kilburn. 8th June 2006
Billy Bragg @ The Tolpuddle Martyrs Festival
Blistering Dorset sunshine, cloudy cider, Tony Benn, OAP’s smoking chong and “There is Power in a Union” encored. Doesn’t get much better than that, comrades.
Take That – Belfast May ’06
The boys are back and performed part of the set about 5 feet from us, cue girly screaming, frantic arm waving and completely forgetting what age you are – and that was only Neil T!

Worst Gig

…and guess what? I went to one of these. Typical.

Maximo Park on NME Tour
Only went to see the Monkeys who were “supporting” them. First gig I have ever walked out of…
Pete Murray at Academy 3, MCR
I went for a girl. Even though the ticket was free and I got laid, what was I thinking?
New Order – Wembley Arena
Tonight we’re going to be Joy Division… I’ll have my forty notes back then Barney. I’ve seen better and more animated karaoke, no wonder they’re on the verge of jacking it in.
Sleepy Jackson @ Academy 3 MCR
That guy is sooooooooooooooo dull. A genuinely classic LP Lovers spoilt for all time by the Australian ego-maniac.
Ryan Adams. Apollo Victoria. 24th February 2006
It wasn’t bad as such, just very, very, very, very annoying.
Test Icicles @ MCR Uni
But it was bad in a very good way.
Robbie at Wembley
Especially when that kn*b end Jonathan Wilkes got on stage.

2006 Rocked ’Cos

  • I had the best party I could have dreamed of with the best people I know.
  • Yet more great music was produced, despite the cynics saying it should have ran out in 2003. Canada in particular continued to amaze.
  • I enjoyed life lots.
  • Because I became a dad to twins!
  • I got my favourite ever band to reform, and then DJed at their gig.
  • I finally realised that the person who has made me more happy than I’ve ever been was in front of me all the time!
  • We found out we’d need a double buggy for 2007!
  • Found the best keema jalfrezi in Staly Vegas!
  • I had a hand, however small, in a little bit of pop history.
  • I made some great new friends and didn’t lose any old ones!!! Seen some great bands too.
  • After 8 months of searching we finally found our first perfect house together.

And here are ’El Presidentes’ selections!

Top Five Singles (but, I can have 20 more cos it’s my game!)

Camera Obscura – “Lloyd, I’m Ready To Be Heartbroken”
I think I *heart* Traceyanne (don’t tell Mrs F). Well, I love her voice and I love the strings and it makes me feel the same as she obviously does for Mr Cole. This is the song Roddy Frame never wrote. ’Single of the Year’ by a (Scottish) country mile. Oh, and it’s got the gayest video ever too!
Hot Chip – “Over & Over”
Of course me and Karl C we’re into these aaaaaagesssssss ago and they’ve definitely developed and delivered since. One of several stand out tracks on the album. It wasn’t lost on me that they re-released it, re-released it, re-rel- geddit?!
Captain – “Broke”
So what if it sounds like Prefab Sprout, more power to their plagiaristic elbow!
Lily Allen – “Smile”
Ignore the overplayed lead track (even with it’s fab Janet Kay Lovers Rock-tastic vocals) and head to ’Cheryl Tweedy’ (never a bad thing in my eyes!). Self loathing never sounded so sweet! How can this be overlooked for inclusion on the album when that awful song about her brother got the nod???!! Tssssssssssssk!
Peter Bjorn & John – “Young Folks”
Vive les Swedes and the art of whistling. Probably the ’single of the year’ in most peoples charts. You’d have to be dead, dumb and deaf not to like this…
The Long Blondes – “Once & Never Again”
Best song about being 19 since P-P-Paul Hardcastle. Official.
Mark Ronson – “Just”
Radiohead for happy people.
Enter Shikari – “Sorry, You’re Not A Winner”
Music of choice for ’the kids’ – NuRave Metalcore – yay! I like it!
The Whip – “Frustration”
Like New Order never went away or changed tack from 1983…muchos wetting of pants in these parts then.
CSS – “Let’s Make Love & Listen To Death From Above”
Nearly as catchy as ’Young Folks’. Top video and the how fit is the Brazilian Bjork-a-like too?! It’ll make you blush when you realise what it’s all about (and true apparently!)
Forward Russia! – “Eighteen”
Leeds! Leeds! Leeds! Bet they don’t play this when the teams come out at Elland Road. They should.
Beck – “Cellphone’s Dead”
The b-boy is beck
Broken Social Scene – “7/4 Shoreline”
Canadian hi-hat alt wig-out
Raconteurs – “Steady As She Goes”
Don’t care what anyone says, it sounds like Joe Jackson at the start. Not a bad thing.
The Good, The Bad & The Ugly – “Herculean”
Albarns back. Back again. Quality.
The View – “Wasted Little DJ’s”
Next big thing to do a Kaiser Chiefs probably. Catch ’em now before Jo Whiley rinses ’em to death on daytime radio.
Yeah Yeah Yeah’s – “Gold Lion”
Top single from a top album – Karen O can do no wrong.
Young Knives – “Weekends & Bleak Days (Hot Summer)”
They knew didn’t they! Must be in league with the devilllle! Sound track to the sunniest days in Britain since ’76
The Gossip – “Standing In The Way Of Control”
Immense. Apparantly the missus reckons the Soulwax mix is the one but I think it’s sounds like chipmunks. Original and best.
Just Jack – “Writer’s Block”
What Mike Skinner should’ve sounded like
The Organ – “Memorize This City”
Manc sounding Smith copyists. I’m settling here nicely!
Pigeon Detectives – “I’m Not Sorry”
Leeds strikes again! Next big thing after the next big thing listed above.
Louis XIV – “Pledge Of Allegiance”
Dirty Pretty Things – “Bang Bang You’re Dead”
Karl does a Pete.
Polytechnic – “Pep”
Disgracefully overlooked – big up!

Top Five Albums

Fratellis – “Costello Music”
How can a bunch of arsey tw*ts make such a good album?
The Rifles – “No Love Lost”
The cockney Arctic Monkeys in a mod fashion. Please release the ’Theme From Minder’!
Arctic Monkeys – “Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not”
Everybody has got this album. And so they should.
Hotchip – “The Warning”
The Pipettes – “We Are The Pipettes”
Three polka dotted girls in a sixties girl group take with an ace backing band.

Best Film
“The Da Vinci Code” – Sorry, I’ve only been to see one film this year…

Worst Film
“The Squid & The Whale” – …this one was on DVD and it should’ve gone straight there. Rubbish.

Best TV

  • Sopranos (E4) – it ends next year, what are we going to do??!
  • Towers of London (Bravo) – you couldn’t make it up. Car crash telly.
  • Soccer AM (Sky) – I love Hels Bells cos she loves the 42. Chelle reckons it’s Tim I really love though.
  • Extras (BBC2) – supposed difficult 2nd series proved better than the first.

Worst TV

  • Reality/Celebrity/Jungle/Factor/Rivals type programmes – all sh*t and pointless.
  • Eastenders – why is Phil Daniels doing this dirge???

Top Player Cristiano Ronaldo – what’s goin on?? Me voting for a a Man Yoo player two years on the trot??! Maybe it’s the Portugueseness. Dunno. Absolute star who goes from strength to strength eclipsing that horrible rag’s (The Sun) despicable witch-hunt after the World Cup. Forca! (now sign for the Arse Ronnie!)

Worst Player Lucas Neil – how, pray tell, does an Aussie thug get courted by some Europe’s top clubs??? If it was Tim Cahill I’d get it, but…

Best Football Moment

Getting to Paris
Never thought it would happen in my lifetime!)
Not losing to Spurs in the last derby at Highbury
We should’ve – thank you Michael Carrick!
Italy winning the World Cup
I backed them!
Dennis Bergkamp testimonial
Fitting farewell to a genuine legend and seeing Marco Van Basten almost score a better goal than THAT volley in 88!)
Liverpool v West Ham Cup Final
A neutrals fantasy come true!

Worst Football Moment

22.33 in Paris on May 17th
From then on it was all over
Realising I’ll never go to Highbury again
Not selling Henry
I think we’ll regret not banking £50m, unless of course he breaks his Big Cup Final drought…
Being asked to pay £7 for a pie and a pint at the Emirates
A 12 year wait to get a season ticket for this??!

Best Gig: Phoenix @ Academy, Manchester – it’s all a bit too effortlessly easy for the French these days innit!

Worst Gig: The Sleepy Jackson (Manchester Academy) – too much, too loud, too extra.

2006 Rocked ’Cos

  • Moved to a lovely new house with minimal fuss or bother
  • Finally had that wedding party I’d dreamed of and it lived up to all my expectations!
  • The World Cup was on
  • The hot summer (hot hot summer)
  • Got to go to Cuba before Fidel leaves us and loved it (with a twist of sympathy for the hemmed in natives).